Has it been a week yet?

At some point in the near past, I announce my switch to veganism for a month. I feel like its been forever since that announcement, but I believe it has actually only been one week.

So far, its been pretty awesome. I’ve had some issues stabilizing my bloodsugar (I go from ‘hungry’ to ‘dying of hunger’ pretty quickly) but its also been really nice to be spending so much time back in my kitchen. I love cooking. I love eating. Its a win/win for me… until it becomes unhealthy that is.

I’ve done some amazing things this week; I ate tofu for the first time (since the last time!) and actually liked it! I’ve made my own almond milk. Several recipes I’ve tried have turned out fantastic*. Kale chips are my new go-to snack.

Unfortunately I’ve been so excited to eat my food, I haven’t photographed any of it. The one meal I did manage ( quinoa pasta with nooch tomato sauce) was just a useless cellphone picture.

I’ll try to be better in the future.

Today I made an executive decision: instead of changing my work schedule for a day to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two – the Midnight Showing, I’d decided to keep my schedule the same so I can work out in the morning. The movie will still be there this weekend.

If you’re interested in incorporating some vegan meals into your diet, I highly recommend the beautiful food porn website, www.findingvegan.com.  Seriously, awesome stuff.

*I was going to upload a picture of some amazing chocolate pancakes I made with homemade strawberry syrup (that was maybe 300 calories all together- omg, so amazing!) but alas, the picture will not upload. Perhaps another day.

June Goals and May Round Up

Mt. Susitna, 2011

So, to recap the spectacle that was the month of May:

I got a new roommate and almost immediately, drama ensued. I had all sorts of plans for Mother’s Day, which were intercepted by my friend, but made for a significantly more enjoyable weekend. After spending literally months convincing myself I didn’t want to attend one of my best friend’s wedding, I finally made the decision, and to be honest, it was such a beautiful event. I’m so glad I went. While I was in Ohio, the Blogger Apocalypse happened and my Anniversary post kind of got passed over. I lost 30 lbs in a year, eating whatever I wanted. Ideally, I would have lost more, but the important thing to remember is, after actively gaining weight for nearly 10 years, I have finally made a huge commitment with evidential proof that my health is precious and I’m finally putting it up as a priority. I wrapped the month up with a nice long walk; 9.5 miles to be exact.

AKRFW, 2010

This month, I’ve got two races lined up, the Skinny Raven Twilight 12k which is THIS friday, right after work. The Alaska Run for Women is the next Saturday. I might end up banditing that one… I keep trying to register, and they keep not registering me. Its very frustrating. On three seperate occasions, they have not charged me a single time, and well… fine, AKRFW. Don’t take my money. I will still go. I will always go as long as I’m in this state.

As for the rest of the month, my goals are centered around progressing with c25k. I think I kinda chickened out. It doesn’t seem right that I should be running at any pace at the weight I’m currently at. I lost my balls, and now I gotta get them back.  I also need to do a better job of tracking my food. I think for this week I’m going to take pictures of all my meals. Starting Wednesday, and going through til the 11th because the holiday has totally screwed me up. Oops.

Hope everyone’s June is as awesome as they hope it to be!

Current weight: 290.1

Instead of THIS, Try THIS!

After conferring with my cousin, my mother and one of my friends, I’ve decided not to go on the Bird Ridge trip. Today, I am acutely aware of my IT band, and the bottom of my calves feel like they’ve been ripped and slathered in lactic acid… which is probably the case.

So instead of ascending 3500 feet in 2.5 miles, I’ll just walk 10 miles instead. I keep meaning to get in a long walk, and since the weather has been so beautiful these last couple of days, I just don’t think I can put it off any longer. Because 10 miles on a relatively flat course is going to be a lot easier than 2.5 with over a mile elevation gain… right? I’m crazy. Thats all there is to it.

Expect a full report on Saturday!


Anniversary Post

So, this was originally supposed to be posted on May 13th. Except, I was in Ohio, and Blogger was experiencing their own apocalypse. On ward, and upward, I always say!

(my official before picture)

Starting weight: 323.3
Todays weight: 292.3
Total lost in one year: 30 lbs

How I feel about that:

Awesome. I have maintained a weight loss of 30 for nearly a year. The last time I lost weight, I was 16, and I was starving myself. It hurt, and I scared me. But now, I have a lot going on for myself this year.

I was so hung over in this picture…

Originally, I was going to make this a long drawn out post, detailing all the cool stuff I’ve accomplished in the last year, all the heart ache I suffered but survived through, and a list of goals set for the future, but most of that is covered in my “about me” tab, and as for goals this year? I just want to keep moving forward.

To those that read my ramblings and constant “I” statements, I appreciate it, I love your comments and I am so glad I’ve chosen to share my journey with you. Reading your blogs and tweetchats has been a great inspiration to me, and I love you all. Thank you for sharing in this with me.

Weekly Goals


I thought to help keep myself on track a little better, I’d make a list of weekly goals. I’m usually pretty good about obtaining short term goals, so we’ll wee how this goes. Its important not to overwhelm myself, but if I can stick to a few general ideas, then I think it’ll be a success.

The goals this week are (drumroll please!):

  • Complete week 5 of c25k 
  • Get in at least one session of weights at the gym
  • Eat salad for dinner every night
  • Walk home from work every night
  • Use my brand new Polar ft4 during each workout
  • Track my food intake

I just realized my schedule is going to be a little off than usual because the film festival is starting to warm up again, and I’ll be programming for a second year. The meetings start this week, and pretty soon I’ll be knee deep in documentaries. I’m going to have to create a fabulous new workout program I can do while watching all these documentaries. I can’t be sitting around all summer! I’m going to Hawaii in September!


Mother’s Day Weekend

Me, and my awesome cleavage

… aka: Where Nothing Goes as Planned. (I hear this is basically the heart of motherhood, so I’m glad we’re already on track!)

Friday after work,  I wandered around midtown Anchorage, running a few errands, but hoping to find a heart rate monitor. Its really been bothering me that I don’t always know how my heart is doing, and the more I work out, the longer I run, the more it stresses me out. I didn’t find what I was looking for at Walmart, Fred Meyer or Sears, but I didn’t really expect to. What I did find was long lines, former clients and a sore body from wearing shoes I should have thrown away two years ago.


Its always weird when I run into former clients out side of work. I never know what to say… Yup, still doing the same thing, boring I know. Like my stability is an oddity or something. One of my kids is working at one of the aforementioned stores which is awesome. The other one is moving out of state in a few days, on a whim, with no real plan. I wanted to tell her she was being dumb, but the truth is, I think it’ll be a great experience for her, even if it blows up in her face. Maybe even especially if it blows up in her face.

Friday night I went to see Cedar Rapids, with Ed Helms. It was… raunchy. It was really difficult to care about the plot, even though I loved all the characters. I won’t say anything more than that, because, well, if I never saw it again, it’d be okay.

Megan and Beau

Saturday, I had every intention of going to the gym, or going on an 8 mile walk. I did neither. Instead i stayed in bed until 2:30pm, walked up to REI, bought myself a Polar ft4 because I simply couldn’t wait/resist/stop myself, and then stopped by titlewave which is this totally awesomely huge used bookstore, and picked up a vegetarian cookbook, Women Runners, and The Complete Book of Running for Women. Knowledge is power, and while reading blogs are nice, I wanted something that wasn’t backlit to gather information from. I’m hoping in the following weeks the cookbook will come in handy as I am running out of things to eat that aren’t… gross. I think in the following weeks I’m going to make a new recipe once or twice a week and share it here.

Megan and Nathaniel

Saturday evening I went to see Something Borrowed with my friends. It was cute, if a bit droll. And even though I am generally very open to how relationships come to pass, and the circumstances life brings, some aspects of it got really annoying really quickly. I won’t say which one(s), but if you’d like go guess, or you’ve read/seen it and know, then I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about. I would love to read the books that it was based on as I think the character development as meant by the author would be a bit more intriguing. I do plan on purchasing it when it comes out; it’ll be a great movie to watch on rainy afternoons.

Sunday I was invited to brunch with my BFF and her husband and two adorable children. It was a chilly afternoon, but we ate at the park and the kids played for a bit on the slides and rocking horse. Beaumarie (aged 2) did not like the swing at all. She does however, love my tits. Can’t really blame her, they’re pretty awesome. My boobs are like a pillow. After the park, they invited me to have dinner with them as well. I really wanted to go on my walk, but the weather was getting ugly and as we were driving back to their place, it started to rain. We watched Dirty Dancing, then started to get dinner ready. Dinner for them was steak, potatoes and corn. There wasn’t enough corn for me, which was fine, so I had chicken and potatoes. Everything just seemed a little undercooked. Undercooked chicken is never something you want, and I didn’t eat most of my second piece.

Angel food cake with strawberries

Dessert was angel food cake with strawberries. I guess she bought the strawberries presugared, so they were pretty sweet. I 86’d the coolwhip because its gross. Then the babies were put to bed and I was taken home. It was really nice hanging out with them, but it reinforced the whole, “I never want babies” thing. They cry too much.

After I was dropped off, my roommate and I finally went on a walk. A short walk, two miles all together. It gave us time to chat a little more. She likes telling the same stories over and over. And not listening to me, or letting me speak. It’s very easy for my conversation to get lost because it takes me a while to formulate what I want to say, and then even longer sometimes to make sure I’m not tripping over my words. She’s not really one for idle silence, while I have no problem letting the conversation cease. I did let her know that I’m a fiercely independent person, so hopefully she won’t get too offended when I don’t invite her to be a part of my life.


At some point, I called my mom several times to wish her a happy day, and to hear how it all went, but each time I called her I was interrupted by someone else. But just in case its not clear, I love who I am today, and I wouldn’t be me, if not for my mom. I hope every had a great weekend. I know I did. I’m really excited to use my heart rate monitor on Tuesday when I go to the gym. I’ll be starting week 4 of C25k!

Happy Mother’s Day!

Weekend and April Round Up

This has been a very crazy weekend, international news wise. It started with Prince William and Catherine Middletons Royal Wedding, and ended with Osama bin Laden’s death. I stayed up until 5amon friday (having to go to work at 8:30am) to watch the new couple have their first “official” kiss as husband and wife. The Duchess of Cambridge (as she is now known) looked positively glowing, and just as a princess should. I thought her dress was very simple, but stunning, and her sister was just down right hot. The Duke of Cambridge (as Prince William is now known) totally rocked the military uniform. Formal military uniforms are always hot, and Prince Harry was looking pretty sexy too.

I first heard about the bin Laden thing on twitter. One of my cousins retweeted something about a mission accomplished sign being brought out again, and my brow furrowed. “What the heck is happening, world?” I asked myself. I found out quickly enough, and may I say, I am so glad that Obama was the one to give the speech that bin Laden had been killed. I feel like it somehow validates his presidency a little bit further. It also clarifies why he laid to rest the birth certificate issue, which was dumb and a waste of time. I hope those directly affected by the 9/11 attacks and other attacks brought on by Al-Qaeda will find a bit more peace. Surely this will only make for some more unrest, but for now, we can breathe a sigh of ease.

On to less depressing topics, shall we?

Taken yesterday during my walk

This April, I accomplished quite a bit.

  • I finally started to focus on my breathing, which has helped tremendously in continuing the c25k training. I’m on week 4 so far. I can’t wait to continue it tomorrow!
  • I redecorated my blog, made it a little easier to look at, and designed a new header. Also, declared my official exit from the 300’s and entry back into the 290’s. Quite proud indeed!
  • And I completed my second and third walks of the season, a happy 4 mile MS Walk, and this past weekend’s Heart Run.

Things that have happened but didn’t make it to my blog, I registered for 3 more races!

I’m really excited about all these races, but the Portland Rock and Roll Half has got to be the one I’m most excited for.  Just a couple of weeks ago my mom and I were talking about how the only thing our family does during get-togethers is sit around, eat and gossip. And while its fun to catch up on things, it is also not encouraging of healthy behaviors and lifestyles, especially since we all seem to be on a kick start of them recently.

After talking with my absolutely beautiful, wonderful, and most favoritest cousin, Mama T, she decided we would run a half marathon together, and she chose the one in Portland since that is where we grew up. In the week or so since that decision, two of her friends, and several of our other cousins have signed up to run with us. All of a sudden we are having a family reunion based around a half marathon, a first and most epic event in our family history. I am super excited to see her again, and the rest of my family and to sit around, gossip, eat, and run.

W3D2 C25K

This morning, I got up, slowly, and with less enthusiasm than I’m previously accustom to these days, hastily stretched my body and booked it to the bus, with 2 minutes to spare. I walked my away across the giant mall parking lot, and into the gym. I hopped on the the very last (or very first, depending which way you’re counting) in the row elliptical, and did a random set for 10 minutes. Usually, I do the Cardio option, but I wanted to mix it up a little.

After I finished the elliptical, I moved on to the row of treadmills and hopped on one of those. I started Week3 Day 2 of c25k, and just went for it. In the beginning, and then again towards the end, my lower back/hip on the left side started feeling a little pinchy. I’ve never had a pain there before and since it happened when I was walking, not jogging, I figured it was just a bit of alignment being thrown off. I sure hope its not anything too serious. I stretched when I got home, and I feel fine now. But I think at this point I really do need to take days off from the program in between days. Usually I do this same routine every Tuesday Wednesday and Thursday. From now on, I’m going to give myself a break in between days. I’ll still be going to the gym, but on Wednesdays I’m going to do the circuit training instead.

So it shall be written, so it shall be done.

Improptu Walk

Today my friend asked me if I was going on the MS walk on saturday. I responded, “What? There is a walk happening that I don’t know about? How can this be?”

As we were texting to get the details, I registered myself for it. It didn’t even occur to me to not participate. Registration is free, though they do encourage walker/runners to donate/fundraise. I’m no good at that, so I’ll probably give them a handful of dollars and call it a day.

This walk is taking place around Lake Hood in Anchorage, AK. In the past I live relatively close to it, and use to walk up to the restricted access sign and then turn back around. I’m pretty sure this course is going to lead us all the way around this time which excites me to no end. I hope I get to take some pictures. Lake Hood is the countries busiest float plane lake. The statisitcs have failed me as its nearly 1am and I have to be up in 6 hours, but last I hear, I was pretty impressed.

My eating today was delicious. I did not count calories, and if I had, I would probably hate myself for it. I’m trying this thing where I don’t attach guilt to the food I eat. Its difficult at the best of times, and today was pretty okay. It helps when I plan out my days meals in advance, and I didn’t do that for today. It probably won’t happen for tomorrow either.

On that note, I’m going to try to get my sleep on and prepare for tomorrow! Have a great night or beautiful day!


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom” Anais Nin

I think this is the quote that finally got me moving last year. The quote that made me reconsider my entire life. When is enough, enough? At what point do I say, “I am ready to face the unknown!” and actually do it? I’ve been scared my whole life. Scared of being made fun of, scared of dying, scared of living, scared of disappointing others, scared of disappointing myself. I’ve encouraged myself to stay hidden in the shadows, to not participate in life, to accept being shy as an excuse to not communicate, all for what?

Of course, over the years I’ve made huge leaps and bounds. I went off to college with no money in a place I’d never visited, with no real support system. I moved to Alaska in basically the same situation. But I still only did the minimum required of me. Even today, I still feel like there is more I could do to participate, to be engaged. It was always seemed so much safer to tread the water, not knowing what lied beneath the murkiness. I think if I just put my feet down for a minute, I would realize how shallow the water actually is, how much easier it is to stand on my own two feet and trust myself not to drown.


Since reading that quote over a year ago, I have seen progress. I’ve participated in life. I’ve walk the walk, I’ve talked my talk. I stood up in front of hundreds of people knowing I could have looked better, but still felt proud of myself, because I was proud of myself. I accepted that they accepted me just as I am.

I see now that I’m blossoming. I see the change within me.

Looking back over your progress, do you see change, emotionally and/or physically? What kind of changes do you see?