Vacation with Mother

Its been a while, eh? I’ve been busy, trying to eat well, deal with living on my own for the very first time ever, and right now, I’m sitting in a hotel room in Northern California, watching the light fade into fog, listening to my mother snore, and curiously wondering the fate of this beautiful state. This blog used to be dedicated to politics and other junk media before it started to bore me. Specifically, I wrote in here quite a bit regarding same sex marriage and Alaska politics.

I am for same sex marriage, and unions, and love. I think two people loving each other is a beautiful thing. Judge Walker the federal judge who overturned Prop 8 today seems to be a very brave man. I surely hope this doesn’t go the way of all the other failed attempts to legalize gay marriage. That’s all I have to say about that today.

As for my eating, I think I’ve been doing well. We went on a couple of walks today. One was hardcore (even though the trail was marked as moderate) and I didn’t actually make it to the end. It started out relatively easy, but once we reached the bench, it started going down very steeply and muddily in all most a spiral. Off in the distance, I could hear the waves crashing onto the shore, and I knew if I just kept at it a little longer, I would be rewarded. But the trail wouldn’t let up, and it was raining, and I just had to turn around. Of course I was a little disappointed I hadn’t finished it, but climbing up from where I stopped was so intense, I had to stop every 10 feet to catch my breath. It was a good thing I stopped where I did, because just when I was about to reach where I had left my mom, I saw her working her way down the trail.

My mom broke her leg last year. Her thigh bone snapped then shattered, and there’s 17 pins and a titanium rod holding it together now. She is also overweight like me, (I’m over weight like her?) and has really bad arthritis in both of her knees. She sometimes uses a cane, and can’t really walk for more than 15 minutes at a time. Each step she takes is a terrible terrible struggle. Her going down that trail might have made toss in her towel, no joke. It was brutal. Gorgeous, but brutal.

She’s also done all of the driving because I never learned how. It was interesting  to see her when she wasn’t in control of the situation. I don’t think I realized how much she needed to be in control. I always felt like she didn’t have control over me, but my opinion is starting to change a little. We got in a sky tram to view the Trees of Mystery and she almost vomited because she didn’t have control over the situation. It was weird.

We also had a fight about food. At the restaurant yesterday, I ordered a 1/4 rack of ribs. She then told the waiter to make it a 1/2 rack because she might want to eat some later. She insisted. I didn’t want all that meat. I wanted what I wanted. There was good chance that I wouldn’t have eaten all of the 1/4 rack because I wasn’t really that hungry. But instead, she won, and we didn’t talk for all of dinner.

Have you ever had to fight your own mother for food? I felt like I was 5 years old again, disappointed to open the fridge after school, expecting to see my dessert from the night before, just to realize it had already been eaten. This happened all through out my childhood. If I didn’t eat it first, if I didn’t eat it all, then there was a good chance I would never have the opportunity to eat it again. We were poor. There were many many days when we just didn’t know where our next meal was going to come from.

I hate feeling that way. Its just food, and more can be obtained. I know this now. But sitting in that restaurant, with my back to everyone (so I wouldn’t make faces or stare at the other guests, because that’s what I did when when I was a child- don’t all of them? This two year old was totally flirting with me today at lunch!), not being allowed to order what I wanted to order, made me flip my lid. I followed the beach back to the hotel (which was something I needed) which was about a mile away, and tried to work out my anger. As soon as I got to the room, my mom left. She couldn’t be around me either.  (This is all figured out and water under the bridge, by the way)


(That’s my “I’m stressed and I don’t know what to do next!” face)
I’m about to go to bed, we have another long day of driving and not much else tomorrow. We’re going up the hwy 101, and going to stay the night in some small town off the ocean in Oregon, before finally making our way “home”. I don’t have a home in Oregon anymore. Its weird to say that. The only home I have is the one I’ve created for myself in Alaska.
Okay. I’m getting a little too off topic. I must be super tired . Until next time, friends.
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And The World Spins Madly On…


So. Anchorage. For a minute, I was really proud to live here. And then Dan Sullivan decided to go with the majority and veto AO 64s which added sexual orientation to the anti-discrimination law. So technically we’re back to square one. However, there is a chance to get one Ms. Ossiander to change her vote and override the veto. Here is my letter to her.

Ms. Ossiander,

My supervisor who is a registered voter and Alaskan born, is generally very progressive regarding his politics, was confused about AO 64. “Why does it matter if this is passed, isn’t apart of federal anti-discrimination law already?” he asked me after seeing my picture in the newspaper from the protest the day before.

I had to explain to him that, no, it’s not. It is not mandated by federal court. Any and all protective measures for the LGBT community are at the city and state level currently.

There is a huge problem with discrimination in this town. Its even bigger than anyone thought because even the Mayor is under the impression that it doesn’t even exist. The citizens are under the impression if it doesn’t exist then it doesn’t need protection. However, by saying that it doesn’t exist and doesn’t deserve a paragraph in Anchorage’s anti-discrimination law, you are discriminating. You are refusing to acknowledge the handful of citizens who might be protected by it. Discrimination rarely comes from the minority, but rather the majority.

It is so frustrating to try and explain why this fight is so important. How can we possibly ask for equality in marriage and death and children when we can’t even get it at the most basic civil level of housing and employment?

My supervisor was very surprised to learn that LGBT rights is not covered in the EEOC. He assumed that it had been included because why would it not be? As soon as he had learned this fact, his entire opinion and demeanor changed. It changed because he believes in the Declaration of Independence which states, “all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

I worry about how many others in this state (and the country, for that matter) don’t realize that there isn’t that basic protection. I wonder how many votes, how many minds might be swayed if they realized they were wrong to assume it was already a protected right somewhere at the federal level?

I am very lucky to work in a place that I don’t have to fear my termination because of my sexual orientation. The fact remains though, my supervisor could fire me for being gay if he so chose.

You have the ability to affect real change. You have the voice, the gavel and the opportunity to do the right thing.

As a resident of anchorage, and a registered voter, I am asking you, please do the right thing Ms. Ossiander, and override Mayor Sullivan’s Veto. Take a stand with your fellow assemblymen and show this city, this state, and this country that Anchorage is accepting of all its citizens, regardless of race, creed, gender, sexual orientation, age, or disability.

Thanks to henkimaa.com for the pic. I didn’t ask.

So gay

In repsonse to Bent Alaska asking us to email the new Mayor dude, Sullivan, I wrote this:

Im going to make this short. You have an opportunity to show this city and this state and this country that Anchorage cares about all of its citizens and their right to be treated equally under the law. The law does not currently protect rental situations and employment situations where I were honest to my landlord or supervisor found out I identify myself as queer, I could be kicked out of my apartment and fired from my job. This is a very real threat to me.

Some might say to not put myself in a situation where that is a possibility. I say you have the ability to make those potential situations an impossibility.

This crossroads is offering you a chance to make a right decision. Protect your grandchildren and your friends and family. Please treat the LGBT community equal to everyone else in this state.

Thank you for your time.

To Assembleyman Chris Birch of District 6 in Anchorage Regarding your No Vote:


On the Gay Rights Ordinance. I don’t have any nice to say, and generally I don’t say anything if that’s the case. After reading this story that states you’ll vote NO regardless of the testimony in front of you, I just have to say this:

I hope your children, and grandchildren grow up and realize they’re gay. And then I hope they get fired, and evicted for being gay. And then they can blame you because you didn’t protect them when you had the chance.

You are a poor representative of this town.

Some say the Apocolypse is a’comin’…

… and others say its just evolution. I don’t care either way. But its been a very busy weekend.
GOP Maine Senator behaves in a dumb fashion, out of touch with the realities of today by voting to strip pandemic monies from stimulus fund, Mexico becomes diseased with Swine Flu, which we can’t protect ourselves from because of Maine, then has an earthquake, Ms. California still doesn’t get the punchline, probably because she’s trying to smell a scratch n’ sniff at the bottom of a pool.

Good news though, Gays are lining up in Iowa to get married, because their state government doesn’t suck as much as the rest of the country’s (certain states excluded, of course).

It looks like rain outside, and that makes me sad. I hope I don’t get sick.

Could this be the beginning of the end for Amazon?

I’m sure it won’t get that bad. But from where I’m sitting, I feel as though we are on the edge of a precarious cliff, and this could be what makes the Fight for Equality go either way.

An Author, Mark Probst has noticed sales rankings being stripped from LGBTQ books on Amazon.

This is going to be huge.

Its like a Twofer!


So, the Obama Admisitration is being totally hip by inviting an unknown ammount of gay, lesbian, transgender, queer families to the White House’s annual Easter Egg Hunt this year.

The hunt has been happening for many years, (though this is the first time I’ve ever heard of it- go figure) and I guess the LGBTQ clique has been not present for most of those years. Joe.My.God. mentioned that the LGBTQ clique was invited in 2006, just to be shunned by the crazy right wing people, and allegedly ruined the event for everyone.

Whatever, whatever.

I really hope that Obama isn’t teasing us, treating us like equals to make us feel equal, but in the long run still denying us those last few civil rights we’ve been fighting for, for so long.

Glad you were here, see you later. Hopefully.

Som this Methodist Bishop guy seems like a real cool dude. Stood up for the rights of Homo’s everywhere, when it was especially unpopular, back in the 70’s and 80’s. Did some cool things like put an openly gay minister on a pulpit in Colorado.

Unfortunately, we have lost him to the cycle of life. His work lives on, and I hope he will not be forgotten.

He sounds like a real cool dude.